Monoblogue by Neil Berliner: You’re So Vai…Irrelevant!

by Neil Berliner

David Geffen is apparently not the subject of Carly Simon’s 38 year-old song, “You’re So Vain”. The only person vain enough to care about this story at this point is probably Carly Simon!

After Russia’s poor showing in the Olympics, president Medvedev blasted his country’s officials who prepared their athletes. Those officials are petrified that upon returning to their homeland, they’ll be greeted with little, round “lead medals”.

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Humor Column: The Urban Erma by Leighann Lord: Back from Iraq! The Desert is No Place for Neat Freaks

By Leighann Lord

Entertaining the troops in the Middle East back in 2002 during Operation Enduring Freedom was a once in a lifetime opportunity. Spending 30 days on bases in Afghanistan, Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia was alternately thrilling and exhausting. I assumed I’d never do it again. But alas, my wanderlust got the better of me and – thanks to Armed Forces Entertainment –- off I went to Iraq: Five comics, nine bases, 10 days. Amazing!

Hands down, military audiences are some of the best I’ve ever performed for. Given the stressful environment and dangerous jobs they do, the soldiers are highly appreciative of the brief respite they get from visiting entertainers. We are treated like gold.

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Monoblogue by Neil Berliner: It’s Already a Movie!

By Neil Berliner

This weekend I’ll be renting that flick about the Toyota mess: Total Recall.

Billy Tauzin, the former congressman, is resigning as the head of the pharmaceutical industry lobby group, PhRMA. He’ll probably be replaced by a lesser known, generic spokesperson who’ll do essentially the same thing that he did, but for less money.

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Monoblogue by Neil Berliner: Been There, Done That

By Neil Berliner

The president has reversed George Bush’s decision to send astronauts to the moon, saying that we already did that in the ’60s. Obama went on to say that he also won’t be sending any more troops to Viet Nam or inviting the Beatles to the White House!

Pee Wee Herman is hoping for a big comeback by doing a revival of his live stage show. By “comeback”, I hope he doesn’t mean the theater seats.

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Humor Column: The Urban Erma by Leighann Lord: Playing the Field or Playing for Keeps?

By Leighann Lord

The voters of Massachusetts have spoken, tossing aside stand-in Democrat Martha Coakley for Republican hottie, Scott Brown. It is nothing less than a Twilight Zonian moment to picture a Republican sitting in the seat that Senator Ted Kennedy held for 46 years. Many are painting this as a referendum on “Obamacare,” anger over the economy, and a general anti-incumbent consciousness, but it may not be that deep. Maybe Massachusetts just wanted to get out of the house and play the field.

For better or for worse, what the Democratic Party and the People of Massachusetts had, could be considered a marriage. At the very least it was a long-term, committed relationship, maybe too long. No matter how good a relationship is, it’s natural to wonder what else is out there that you might be missing. Even if Marsha – I mean, Martha – hadn’t run the worst campaign in Christendom, the citizens of Massachusetts were ready to put on their party shoes and hit the dance floor with just about anyone other than a Democrat. They voted on the rebound and Scott Brown just happened to be there.

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Monoblogue by Neil Berliner: Happy Birthday from Daddy Diddy

P. Diddy just bought his son, Justin, a $360,000 Maybach, complete with a chauffeur, for his 16th birthday. To teach his kid the value of a dollar, Diddy is insisting that before his school pick-up each morning, the chauffeur must do a paper route.

Two police officers were just suspended for the rest of the year. They showed incredibly bad judgment by showing up at the pistol range with a basketball.

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